Healing, failing, & Healing Again

 Sleeping, as you breath on my back 

Your body bends to meet mine, now-nothing I lack

Every curve slowly caresses my skin

Emotions moving fast and slow, I gaze - up, I have my chin 

With you I want everything - high and low 

As we move through and within, - a calm flow 

We talk, and bear out our soul

You tame the demon in me, with a heart of gold 

I’ll kill that demon that's a part of me 

Until it’s lost through my actions, you will see

Because it does you no good, 

And it’s the right thing, so I should 

These patterns I hope they fade away,

While in peace we pave our way 

You’re always there for me and I, always, for you,

In the red green yellow and blue 

But there’s a demon in me I’m trying to kill 

Please give me some time, if you will

I’ll do better and strive 

To hold you with a gentle palm and realize 

there’s a demon in me, I don’t wanna run 

I’d rather I try with love, & may the future be won.

-Aditi Shetty

Donkeys Talk Golf

 We’re living in a world where politics is a joke 

And World peace is a marketing strategy 

there’s donkeys talking about golf while children are dying, 

generational trauma is being provoked as an occurrence so normal 

kindness becomes your weakness 

And speaking up is only an option for those who’s bank accounts run deeper than the voice of the collective 

Helplessness is a feeling being caught for free 

Unlike the food banks and hospitals, while a nation prospers by booming bombs in billions

I don’t talk about politics, maybe because being right doesn’t matter

The truth won’t suffice and families will bleed 

My voice won’t be enough for those who didn’t get a chance at life 

Greed can be so strong, it makes love feel like a far fetched dream unable to be grasped, while it slips through my fingers 

I stand here frustrated, grateful for what I have

There’s children dying 

what purpose do I wake up for? 

Day in day out 

Stocks and deaths, climbing up 

We’re singing and dancing and we’re supposed to forget 

That humans can be so sick, some I wish I’d never met 

My brain is like a washing machine, on a perpetual cycle, I circumvent 

While they wear flashy clothes and display their worth, 

I drink my beer

And drink it slow 

Because now I know, that they’re  full of shit and so much fear 

We’re no where near 

Where I’d like to be 

In a world full of pain 

While joy is a 2 minute stop in this fast life train 

So when you go and lie in bed and sleep 

all you have, is being longed for 

Your freedom, your body, your breath 

that you so frivolously take for free. 

-Aditi Shetty. 

Sadlifehappylife

 Warm drops drip 

Thoughts running this trip 

All day and night 

My one true rite  

I’m alone in this space 

With a mind of a maze

Don’t know start to end

It’s all in a bend 

Squeezed in between 

I’ve forgotten to dream 

And I’m lying on the floor 

Starting at a knob on the door 

I’m stuck

Legs held in this muck 

And I’m falling through

No hands to hold on to 

It’s all black, and space is spare 

If only to live I’d dare 

Would I see the light 

With all my might 

And pull myself up

Out of this self-fuck-up,

We call a life 

Full of strife 

With a few happy days 

While the stars hold my gaze 

And the moon shines away 

Until the sun brings a brand new, fucked up day 

(This one is for giving space to all the negative thoughts just as much we aspire to hold positive ones) 

-Aditi Shetty

Dark Challenger

 I got about $20 in my pocket 

We’re bound to think: fuck it 

God I know, in this very moment 

I want to see you, and not be distant 

I’m walking and I stop at the lights,

And wish you were with me, hugging me tight

So I could patiently look into your eyes

While you look into mine 

Now I remember I’m just dreaming 

Or maybe I’m manifesting us singing 

everything doesn’t seem to be much of a bother

your soft palm in my hand, I imagine us like no other

Now I know, that you and I, we understand

That life is too short, and unplanned 

We’re young and way too smart 

To not know that, we’re nothing but art 

There is no secret key, 

It’s just you and me

Melting into each other’s souls 

And onto those calm, quiet strolls. 

-Aditi Shetty. 

exist-errain

 Sick of life

Don’t know what this is

Feels like fire on a knife

Feels like some slow long dizz

Geez how’d I get here

God why do I care

When all is mere

And all is snare
Fuck this shit

I’ll say what I’ll say

You’ll hear what you’ll hear

Because blood isn’t thick

And the stars don’t stick

While the moon falls down

On this evil heaven we call earth

I'll be here and ponder

how being alive is a wonder.

-Aditi Shetty.

Journey

This broken heart lays on the floor

 did I love too less, or more?

These aches,  they don't go away

Tears rolling down, "help me God" I pray

How did this happen to my heart

This breakup, was a mess of art

I feel nothing but lost 

Was the effort worth the cost?

Our last kiss is a stolen memory 

While intimate moments become history 

"Let's be friends" she said 

I thought,  "I'd rather be, dead"

But que séra séra, such is, indeed 

while to life, I pay heed

The sun decides to shine everyday 

And so will I, someday, one day, 

...but not today

Today is just not the day

Tomorrow though 

In my soul, will I know 

That I never needed anyone

And be glad that we're done

-Aditi Shetty.

One-way ladder

Cold sweats 

Deep breaths 

Shivers run down my spine 

Fears exposed and entwine 

I tell myself, "one day at a time"

Survival earned by the hourly dime

Friends and strangers seem alike

Futile Instagram trends on spike

What's the point anyway?

It's all forgotten by the end of the day 

While souls hunting for purpose in bars

Attempting to alcoholize the void of their scars

The unacceptable doom of humanity

we are what we need, there is no path to sanity

Yes, you fool, we are all mad 

What else can we be, in a world so profusely sad?

-Aditi Shetty.